Deciding to 'Come Out' as an Erotic Romance Author

Little background on me. I decided to start writing in June of '10 after the pre-mature birth of my third son. He was born at 31 weeks, nine weeks early, and it was a very rough delivery. I lost a great deal of blood and had some touch and go moments. While I was recovering from my c-section, without my baby, I had a lot of time to think. In my morphine pumped induced state, I considered all the things that I'd done and what I still wanted to do.

I'd had A LOT of fun in my life, and marrying my husband and having my children was a joy that I can never fully explain. One thing I'd wanted to do was write a book. I've always been a heavy reader, my husband used to moan at my monthly bills from the bookstore, and I have an over-active imagination. The trouble was focusing my ADD 'Oh look a squirrel, oh look a penny' self to sit down and write.

I'll post later how I went from a totally clueless hot mess of an writer in June to my first and second book contract in January in another post. -An author is a writer who didn't give up.-

Back to smut! :D So as I started to refine my style more, I realized that I liked writing about sex...a lot. I enjoyed the emotion of it, the pulse pounding sensations it induced, and how important it was to my stories. I began to experiment with different combinations of genders/fetishes/etc. Sex has never been a taboo subject to me. I feel like I have a European view of it, it's just not that big of a deal. I'd be more ashamed of writing books with gratuitous amounts of violence than I ever would be writing about explicit sex.

Problem is, not everyone feels this way. ;) I use the term 'smut' jokingly, but there are people out there who would be quick to judge me and condemn me for some of the things I enjoy writing about. I adore love, and I personally think the love between a man and a woman, a man and a man, and any combination of consenting adults is amazing. I'm strictly a on man one woman monogamous person myself, but I enjoy talking to people who have thriving non-traditional relationships. As different on the surface as they are, the common basis of love equalizes them.

I tossed and turned as to telling my family about it. I'm a really bad liar and I forget to keep the lie going. As I've gotten older I pride myself on being myself. I try to avoid putting on airs and pretending to be someone I'm not. For me, hiding what kind of books I write would have been pretty much useless. It would have come out in some way, and my extended family would have to deal with not only the fact that I write erotica, but also that I lied to them. These people weren't my bosses that would fire me for writing erotica, they were my family and deserved my honesty and respect. I wouldn't want to be blind-sided by the news and I'm sure they wouldn't either.

Unacceptable.

So I bit the bullet and told my Mom that I write romance. She then proceeded to talk about throbbing loins and heaving breasts and I ran screaming from the room. Then I posted some erotica on my blog, knowing that my family would probably read it. I told my brother's and sister's I write smut, and told them I'm not ashamed of it. I also sent them samples of my work with the nookie whited out. ;) There are some things you just don't want to know that your siblings think and/or read. Did some of them freak out? Yeah, they probably did. But they love me enough to keep any hurtful thoughts to themselves. Though I'm sure it was the discussion of more than one dinner table with shocked gasps and titters. ;)

My books are not pornography. If someone wants a stroke book they will have better luck with a Dear Penthouse. I enjoy world building, creating a story with living and breathing people that will stay with the reader long after the book is done. I love creating romances with depth and passion, and I enjoy giving my characters some amazingly fantastic hot sex. :D

To my fellow romance writers, be proud of who you are and what you do. It takes a HELL of a lot of talent and hard work to get published. Don't let anyone take that away from you by dismissing your writing as 'just smut'. Tell them 'Yes, it's smut...but its fantastic smut!'

Love,
Ann